Tue. Mar 19th, 2024

TL;DR – This is a classic case of running lion towards the west or i’ll put nicely, “A journey to the west”.

It took us a while to figure out what Run Lion meant (for the uninitiated, it’s derived from Hokkien term zao sai which briefly translates to someone in a relationship running away with another man/ woman) and when we finally did, this Carousell listing aptly named Run Lion Wedding Dinner Package – Marina Mandarin suddenly made a lot of sense.

Posted by user foreverlosingmywallet, this tragic but hilarious listing is targeted at all Shotgun/ YoLo/ Urgent/ Budget Couples who wish to take up a wedding dinner package at Marina Mandarin scheduled to happen on 13 October 2017 because of a runaway bride.

The seller explains,

On behalf of the groom almost-to-be, (I cannot mention his name due to a gag order by the supreme council and bounded by a non disclosure agreement), I am letting go a wedding dinner package at Marina Mandarin on the 13th oct 2017.

With price of wedding tables hitting new high, this might just be a very good deal as the seller also listed various perks such as,

  • We will sponsor the wedding car on the day itself (Maserati or Mercedes) – Driver included.
  • We will sponsor the wedding gowns and suits for the couple
  • We will ALSO sponsor the gowns for the sisters!!!

Which we got to mention, you do not worry about size as fitting services are available and FOC which in his words, Godzilla also can wear, pang xim.

The conclusion also perfectly summed up this wretched “running lion towards the west” tale.

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Here’s the entire A-grade listing in full:

Dearest Shotgun/YoLo/Urgent/Budget Couples,

On behalf of the groom almost-to-be, (I cannot mention his name due to a gag order by the supreme council and bounded by a non disclosure agreement), I am letting go a wedding dinner package at Marina Mandarin on the 13th oct 2017.

Here are the juicy details:

  1. 30 Tables (deposit paid)

  2. Letting go at $28888 Before GST (can be nego slightly but the groom is super depressed now, i’ll front the negotiations)

FREE Perks if you take up this package:

  1. We will sponsor the wedding car on the day itself (Maserati or Mercedes)

1.1 Driver included

  1. We will sponsor the wedding gowns and suits for the couple

2.1 Do not worry about size, fitting services are available and FOC

  1. We will sponsor the dresses and suits for both the couple’s parents 3.1 Do not worry about size, fitting services are available and FOC

  2. We will ALSO sponsor the gowns for the sisters!!!

4.1 Do not worry about size, fitting services are available and FOC

4.2 Godzilla also can wear, pang xim

4.3 Sadly, up to 6 sisters only

4.3.1 BUT NEVERMIND!!! If you got more than 6 sisters, i steady bom bi bi TOP UP FOC FOR YOU!!!

  1. We will sponsor the photographer AS WELL AS the videographer for the gate crash AND the wedding dinner itself

Groom’s situation: This is a classic case of running lion towards the west or i’ll put nicely, “A journey to the west” He has paid the ultimate price for conforming to our government’s policy: “Marry young, fuck now, give birth to more babies, help fight the again population.” I urge all fellow Shotgun/YoLo/Urgent/Budget Couples… THIS IS A GOOD STEAL!

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ALTERNATE SOLUTION: Can someone introduce a girl to the groom asap so that they can fall in love before 13th oct 2017 and get married on 13th oct 2017?

P.S.

“I what also don’t have, money I alot, not super super super rich, but rich enough to buy her hermes bao bao just to see her smile… But now… it’s ok. If i cannot be happy, I will want others to be happy… I can even drive the car on their wedding day 13/08/17…”

A 28-yr-old-groom-almost-to-be

Kindly help to share. (referral commission can nego)

THANKS!!!

By Zahra